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Managing Challenging Behaviour

Overview


Occasionally, coaches, staff, and volunteers working with children and young people in sport may need to address challenging behaviour—whether from players, parents, or spectators. This guidance promotes positive behaviour through proactive strategies and highlights both appropriate and inappropriate ways to respond.

The document provides:

  • Good practice principles

  • Preventative planning strategies

  • Responses to difficult behaviour

  • Unacceptable disciplinary actions

 

Core Principles

 

  • Child Welfare is Paramount: The safety and wellbeing of children is the foremost consideration.

  • Clear Behaviour Standards: All participants—including children, parents, coaches, and carers—should understand the club’s expectations and disciplinary processes.

  • Respectful Treatment: Children must never experience harm, abuse, humiliation, or degrading behaviour.

  • Understanding Individual Needs: Some children may display challenging behaviour due to specific circumstances, such as medical or psychological conditions. Coaches should work with parents/carers and, where appropriate, the child to tailor support accordingly.

  • Inclusive Participation: Every effort should be made to include children and support their engagement in sport. Exclusion should be a last resort, used only when safety cannot be maintained.

 

Planning Ahead


Good coaching requires thoughtful session planning that accounts for both the group and individual needs. When preparing sessions:

  • Anticipate behavioural challenges based on previous experience or risk indicators.

  • Discuss concerns with club officials such as the Manager, Safeguarding Officer, or Chairperson.

  • Plan adequate adult supervision; this may include involving parents to ensure a safe and supportive environment.

  • When a child is identified as needing additional support, consult with parents/carers and, if suitable, the child to establish strategies that promote safe participation.

 

Setting Behaviour Expectations


All parties—children, parents, staff, and volunteers—should agree on a “contract of expectations” at the start of the season or prior to events. This should define:

  • Acceptable and unacceptable behaviour

  • Potential consequences or sanctions

  • The process for handling behavioural issues

  • Consultation should include club representatives such as the Manager, Safeguarding Officer, or Chairperson.

 

Responding to Challenging Behaviour
Responses should be:

  • Proportionate to the behaviour

  • Applied promptly

  • Clearly explained to the child and their parents/carers

  • Potential interventions include:

  • Time-out from the activity or group

  • Making amends (reparation)

  • Calm discussion to de-escalate the situation

  • Increased supervision

  • Behaviour contracts outlining expectations

  • Sanctions such as missing a session, match, or trip

  • Temporary or permanent exclusion if necessary

 

Never use the following as disciplinary measures:

  • Physical punishment or threats

  • Ignoring the child or withdrawing interaction

  • Verbal ridicule or humiliation

  • Denial of food, water, toilet access, or changing facilities

 

Review and Long-term Support


If a child frequently receives sanctions:

  • Hold a review involving club officials, the child, parents, and potentially external agencies

  • Evaluate whether continued participation is appropriate

  • Exclusion may be necessary if there’s a persistent risk to safety

 

Managing Challenging Behaviour from Parents and Supporters


Principles

  • Parents and supporters should act as positive role models.

  • They must follow the RFU Code of Conduct.

  • Respect for all players, officials, and coaches is essential.

  • Celebrate good performance from all teams and encourage enjoyment of the game.

 

Unacceptable Behaviour

  • Verbal abuse or intimidation

  • Approaching coaches during games

  • Entering the pitch

  • Foul language or goading

  • Challenging referee decisions

  • Physical contact with children (except in safeguarding/emergency situations)

  • Negative chants or ridicule

 

Possible Actions in Response
Smiths Rugby officials may:

  • Issue a verbal warning

  • Ask individuals to leave the pitch area

  • Set up behaviour contracts

  • Temporarily or permanently exclude the individual

  • Report incidents to the RFU

 

Final Note


The goal of this guidance is to ensure rugby remains an enjoyable experience for children, coaches, parents, and supporters alike. Positive behaviour from adults supports the healthy development of young players and upholds the values of the game.

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